


The Coming Rapture

by emynn (orphan_account)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Established Relationship, Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-28
Updated: 2013-02-28
Packaged: 2017-12-03 21:03:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/702618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/emynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's rapture, and then there's <i>rapture</i>. Severus isn't opposed to either.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Coming Rapture

Contrary to popular belief, Severus suffered fools _quite_ gladly.

They turned him a handsome profit.

Women looking to lose a stone in a week, men distressed over the lengths of their cocks, common fools who believed a single potion could turn their lives around...Severus welcomed them all into his shop. There was no such thing as a miraculous potion, but he himself was miraculous at convincing his customers he had just the potion they needed.

And when some twit of a Seer had the Wizarding world convinced the rapture would occur in a week?

He could already smell the Galleons.

~*~

"This potion will protect me from the rapture?"

Severus nodded. "Yes, particularly from fiery rain.”

“And this talisman?”

“Dipped in a potion that repels hellhounds.”

“And for floods?”

“Well, I _suppose_ I could brew something…for a small fee.”

Severus could barely keep anything on the shelves. His shop was mobbed the second he opened the doors. He’d likely have to close early so he could return to brewing and find more trinkets he could pass off as talismans. 

_And to write that Seer a thank you note._

“Severus Snape, just what do you think you’re doing?”

Severus froze. _Damn it._

~*~

“The shop is closed for the day!” Severus shouted. “It will reopen tomorrow morning.”

“If you’re lucky,” Harry muttered, watching as the grumbling crowd filed out.

“I don’t see why you’re complaining,” Severus said, locking the door. “This afternoon alone I made enough to pay for that ridiculous band you’re insisting on for the wedding.”

“You said you liked the Flaming Bludgers!”

Severus raised an eyebrow.

“But that’s besides the point,” Harry said. “You don’t honestly think the rapture is coming. You’re swindling these people.”

“There’s a demand for these products,” Severus said. “It’s not for me to judge them.” 

~*~

“And when they demand their money back when the rapture doesn’t come?” Harry asked, crossing his arms. 

“I dare them to tell me my potions don’t work perfectly,” Severus replied. “I cannot control whether or not the world ends. I am a simple potions master.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “What am I going to do with you?”

“I was hoping perhaps we could go home and make use of the one jar of lubricant I managed to hide away.”

Harry snorted. “Lube’s popular?”

“Naturally,” Severus said, embracing Harry. “How else would you want to spend your last day on earth?”

~*~

Severus groaned into Harry’s mouth. He could never get enough of Harry riding him. “Fuck, yes,” he gasped.

“I’ll... show… you… _rapture_ ,” Harry panted. He fisted his cock, coming a moment later with a loud moan.

The feeling of Harry’s arse contracting around his cock was enough to do Severus in, and he too came with a shout.

“Well,” Severus said once their breathing had evened out, “I’ll say you certainly taught me a hard lesson about not duping my customers.”

“Prat,” Harry laughed, pressing a kiss to Severus’ chest. “Don’t worry, I’ve learned long ago there’s no changing you.”

~*~

Severus froze. He knew Harry loved him, but he was well aware of his shortcomings. Perhaps Harry would be happier with somebody with an impeccable code of ethics, who didn’t take advantage of the gullible masses. 

“And I’d never want to,” Harry continued. “You’re exactly the man I want.”

Severus rolled on top of Harry and straddled his hips. As he leaned down to kiss him, he made a mental note to close the shop the next day.

The rest of the world might be worried about the world ending, but he had his own private rapture to tend to.


End file.
